Some Beauties I Neglected

My previous optimism towards humanity met its greatest challenge when I came to learn that many whom I used to admire may not deserve this admiration. Men of great talents — math and science geeks, literary geniuses, history savants — easily earned my respect; their intellectual accomplishments are blessings to which I aspire and strive to possess. It, therefore, must have shattered their images within my heart when I learned of their certain deeds which may cast doubts upon their character.

Recently I have been going through a period of intellectual tumult; a major part thereof is realizing that I overestimated the personality of many people. Many with an ostensible smile on their face and with a great command over a talent turn out to be deceptive, base, and selfish. I cannot but question whether my previous expectation was simply too high and whether I should simply lower the bar in the future. Perhaps, one part of growth is to abandon previously cherished ideals — a necessary process to be less oblivious and more practical.

But there is another reason behind this disillusionment that has been permeating me: my very value system is somewhat faulty; my basis of judgment is partial and incomprehensive.

I measured each person by their ability to solve difficult math question, their SAT scores, their reading speed, and the amount of bullet points they manage to list in their LinkedIn profile. A person with a near perfect score on a physics contest no doubts is a hero in my heart; a writer with a nationally renowned novel, a musician with an ineffable virtuoso, an athlete with awe-inspiring grace are all my role models to which I look with ceaseless admiration.

To put simply, ability was my only basis of judgment. Accomplishments are the only worthwhile component of an individual. This, I learned, is not completely wrong, but simply a superficial and incomplete examination of a person. I simply and regrettably overlooked an equally, if not more important, element that shapes a person: his character. I neglected great virtues that elevate one from a mere person to a hero: kindness, compassion, maturity, prudence, honesty, patience… In this world driven by remorseless competition wherein those who prevail are those with the highest test scores and with the most awards, we easily forget these simple yet powerful qualities that make a person a person.

One effect that this long break has on me is that it allows me to reevaluate my value system. During the school year, when my main concern was setting the curve for the next test and impressing my English teacher with a well-written essay, I admittedly reduced these qualities to be irrelevant and trivial platitudes; indeed, the next formula in physics I am learning and the next theorem in economics are more important and conducive to intellectual success.

I was gravely wrong.

From today, I will not easily idolize a person based upon his ability; before I get a full glimpse of his character, his position in my heart is yet to be determined.